Gorgeous, gorgeous writing. Is the woman Anne Kadet of Cafe Anne? You said she was named betty but it was a perfect description of Anne's post from a little while ago.
Noha, thank you thank you for you kind words about my writing. That means so much to me. And thank you too for solving this mystery so now I can go back in and properly cite and tag Anne. I read her piece days before I wrote mine and was not able to retrace my steps and find the author. Some days I hop from piece to piece on Substack and get totally lost. I'm so grateful because I always want to give credit to someone for their inspiration. ❤🙏
Hahahaaa been there done that. There's an essay I read years ago and I reference it in conversations constantly. I've searched everywhere and I can't find it. So frustrating!
This is such a great piece! Your language choices and voice shined. The bit about looking up the restaurant and realizing it was closed was so true and worded perfectly in a way I have never connected before. And your 11 year old colorful clothing bullying incident - essentially the same thing happened to me my freshman year of high school and I still feel the same and embarrassment from that. Thank you for sharing!
Heather, your comment means so much to me. A huge part of the reason I write here and share things like that bullying incident is so that other people don't feel like they're the only ones and that they're not alone. So thank you so so much for sharing. And I'm sorry that happened to you. The shame and embarrassment can be huge. And I am always delighted by what you enjoy wordsmithing wise about my pieces. Thank you so much for sharing that too. xo
Oh wow, Natalie, this just made my heart feel so good. And it means so much to me that something I shared got you thinking in new ways and resonated with you and your own experience. I LOVE that the same squashed down part of you will not be denied anymore! Our 11 year-old selves see each other and know they're not alone! Thank you for the kind words and for sharing your experience with me. ❤️
Thanks Blythe! Oh I soooo get what you mean. I've shopped at Goodwill for decades. Because I like a good deal, I like the treasure hunt aspect of it, I like the non fast fashion of it. And when you said you didn't deserve the pretty clothes, oh how I felt that. I worked on a Landcruiser and lived on dirt roads for years and internalized that pretty clothes were for other women, but I was practical and did useful things and pretty clothes were frivolous and not useful. So there was always this aspect of shame and guilt associated with buying things just because they made me feel pretty. No more! Here's to your pinterest board and your new style. We'll be on this journey together!❤
What a beautiful piece of writing! I’ve only been on Substack for a couple of weeks but every time I find a new writer I’m blown away by the exquisiteness of words when they come together in just the right way. Your piece got me thinking about clothes in a way I never have before and connected me with feelings I don’t think I’ve named in quite the same way before. I feel such empathy for that little 11-year old you in her gorgeous colours, and such pride in that same squashed down part in me that, even though I tried to deny her, would not be denied and is finding her way back to the surface. I’m really looking forward to reading more of your writing! 🩷
I also realized that the update I made to this post never got saved. As Noha pointed out, the woman who wrote about her uniform is Anne Kadet. She's here on Substack too, and if you want to read her whole piece it's linked at the bottom of mine now.
Ha! I have a picture in my visual journal of a woman wearing a hot pink dress. I don't own anything that color, yet alone any bright colors. Most of my clothes have come from Goodwill since I stayed at home in the mountains. I felt that I didn't deserve to pick out "pretty" clothes that weren't functional for the woods. I am creating a Pinterest board for my new style. I still like to purchase less, but I would like to feel more at home in my clothes. Thanks for the writing. It made me smile today.
Gorgeous, gorgeous writing. Is the woman Anne Kadet of Cafe Anne? You said she was named betty but it was a perfect description of Anne's post from a little while ago.
Noha, thank you thank you for you kind words about my writing. That means so much to me. And thank you too for solving this mystery so now I can go back in and properly cite and tag Anne. I read her piece days before I wrote mine and was not able to retrace my steps and find the author. Some days I hop from piece to piece on Substack and get totally lost. I'm so grateful because I always want to give credit to someone for their inspiration. ❤🙏
You're so welcome. And thank you for confirming to me - I thought I might be going crazy 😅😅
Not at all, I was just a bad researcher/rememberer. I've updated my post already and I feel so much better! 😍
Hahahaaa been there done that. There's an essay I read years ago and I reference it in conversations constantly. I've searched everywhere and I can't find it. So frustrating!
This is such a great piece! Your language choices and voice shined. The bit about looking up the restaurant and realizing it was closed was so true and worded perfectly in a way I have never connected before. And your 11 year old colorful clothing bullying incident - essentially the same thing happened to me my freshman year of high school and I still feel the same and embarrassment from that. Thank you for sharing!
Heather, your comment means so much to me. A huge part of the reason I write here and share things like that bullying incident is so that other people don't feel like they're the only ones and that they're not alone. So thank you so so much for sharing. And I'm sorry that happened to you. The shame and embarrassment can be huge. And I am always delighted by what you enjoy wordsmithing wise about my pieces. Thank you so much for sharing that too. xo
Oh wow, Natalie, this just made my heart feel so good. And it means so much to me that something I shared got you thinking in new ways and resonated with you and your own experience. I LOVE that the same squashed down part of you will not be denied anymore! Our 11 year-old selves see each other and know they're not alone! Thank you for the kind words and for sharing your experience with me. ❤️
Thanks Blythe! Oh I soooo get what you mean. I've shopped at Goodwill for decades. Because I like a good deal, I like the treasure hunt aspect of it, I like the non fast fashion of it. And when you said you didn't deserve the pretty clothes, oh how I felt that. I worked on a Landcruiser and lived on dirt roads for years and internalized that pretty clothes were for other women, but I was practical and did useful things and pretty clothes were frivolous and not useful. So there was always this aspect of shame and guilt associated with buying things just because they made me feel pretty. No more! Here's to your pinterest board and your new style. We'll be on this journey together!❤
What a beautiful piece of writing! I’ve only been on Substack for a couple of weeks but every time I find a new writer I’m blown away by the exquisiteness of words when they come together in just the right way. Your piece got me thinking about clothes in a way I never have before and connected me with feelings I don’t think I’ve named in quite the same way before. I feel such empathy for that little 11-year old you in her gorgeous colours, and such pride in that same squashed down part in me that, even though I tried to deny her, would not be denied and is finding her way back to the surface. I’m really looking forward to reading more of your writing! 🩷
I also realized that the update I made to this post never got saved. As Noha pointed out, the woman who wrote about her uniform is Anne Kadet. She's here on Substack too, and if you want to read her whole piece it's linked at the bottom of mine now.
Ha! I have a picture in my visual journal of a woman wearing a hot pink dress. I don't own anything that color, yet alone any bright colors. Most of my clothes have come from Goodwill since I stayed at home in the mountains. I felt that I didn't deserve to pick out "pretty" clothes that weren't functional for the woods. I am creating a Pinterest board for my new style. I still like to purchase less, but I would like to feel more at home in my clothes. Thanks for the writing. It made me smile today.